[TANGO-L] The "cabeceo"

[luda_r1 <luda_r1 @YAHOO.COM>]

Pichi wrote:

"The cabeceo takes practice.  It takes right timing
and
a sharp eye.  One can
avoid an awkward situation by learning patience.  Give

the man time walk
across the floor.  He will make eye contact with you
to confirm his signal.
The cabeceo isn't fool-proof, but ladies, it's the
only way you can get to
dance with the best of Buenos Aires."

I've personally never liked this practice and hope it
never takes solid root in this country. It seems
childish and silly somehow. At least in this culture.
There are other, much more effective ways, of inviting
someone to dance. I suppose it can be fun to play this
game if you're so inclined, but most of the time I
hear women complaining that they find it demoralizing
and embarrassing. I usually arrange to meet people I
know to dance with at any event I choose to attend. If
I can't do that for some reason, I don't go. Sometimes
I'll go in order to catch a certain event or teacher,
but if I don't run into people I know to dance with, I
usually just go home. I really don't like dancing with
complete strangers. If a man doesn't want to take the
time to chat with me, however briefly, before starting
to dance, I usually don't dance with him. Also, some
men exude negative vibes, like I suppose some women
do, too. In such cases body language can be a dead
giveaway, so I simply follow my instincts and stay
away from them altogether. I can't be bothered having
to deal with an attitude when all I want to do is
concentrate on the dance.

Another question I had about Argentine customs is
about the way women dress. I see outfits at milongas
in this country sometimes that make a woman look like
a tart. You know, flashy clothes that shriek for
attention. Black lace stockings, slits up to the
armpits, too much makeup, see-through blouses, and in
general dress inappropriate for a woman of a "certain
age" and shape. Is this supposed to be "authentic" in
some way? Do women in BsAs dress this way?  I thought
that tangueras and tangueros are supposed to dress
simply, understated, so as not to detract from the
dance and focus attention on some garish outfit?

Luda

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