Re: [TANGO-L] Conversations with "Deep Tango": The "Lost Close-Embrace Style" of Tete and Maria

[Brian Dunn <brian @DANCEOFTHEHEART.COM>]

Jonathon wrote:
"...For myself I rarely am interested in dancing tango for fun, but that is
a description of my self not a prescription for how anyone else should
relate to tango."

The Argentine writer Ernesto Sabato once said "Only gringos dance tango for
fun."
But Hispanics in general seem puzzled by the gringo usage "having fun",
which doesn't quite linguistically match their usage of "divertirse"
according to my Spanish professor.  Perhaps the idea of "fun" I'm meaning to
convey has less to do with the "fun" of playing a video game, for example,
and more toward the timeless question of "what am I drawn to do with my
lonely self tonight, and how much satisfaction of various kinds might I
expect as a result?" ;)


Jonathon further wrote:
" "It's really unfortunate that Maria's styling and influence has been
lost to the women." I find this statement agreeable as reflecting a
loss of a choice. But many choices remain..."

Well said.  And it's exactly those choices I was trying to highlight - but
primarily leader's choices, not follower's.  The main issue I was trying to
raise indirectly is the limitations placed on women's choices by the
leader's choices.  Obviously, the leader communicates (and thus necessarily
limits) a set of possibilities, a "container" in space and time for the
follower.  Given the constraints of the "lead-follow" agreement, she
certainly has freedom within that.  But I think we can all agree that if a
leader is delivering (for example) angular, rectilinear, staccato-expressed
quick-rock-step lead information, it will at best be a lot harder for the
follower to get deeply into flowing curving responses with smooth
expression, no matter how much she might wish to (and if it needs to be
said, I thoroughly enjoy leading both ways, so please everybody relax).

Mainly, I just wanted to redirect attention a little bit, in the midst of
the interminable style discussion, to the fact that women might have some
enjoyment goals of their own that would be dependent on the men taking some
interest in their feelings on the matter.  As the style discussion went on,
I was struck with the realization that the conversation even seemed to
mention "women" or "followers" less and less, finally beginning to sound to
me like fashion-conscious men talking about how to wear and walk in their
favorite suits.  Since the first posting, I have been gratified to read the
beautiful followers' posts from Rose, Hyla, and Carole among others, which
for me reoriented the conversation more around the central concept of tango
as a relationship.

<Flame retardant mode ON>

Hey guy, dancing (=your Style's name here=) is *fine*, OK? I *like* dancing
(=your Style's name here=) myself...just looking for a little *balance*,
OK?...

<Flame retardant mode OFF>
;> ;> ;>

Jonathon further wrote:
"I'll end this by asking if there exists any video of Maria dancing with
Tete?"

Apparently, there is nothing available commercially.  Tete was allegedly
resistant to begin a formal tango teaching career when he was dancing with
Maria, preferring just to dance with her at the milongas, and encouraging
prospective students to "just watch".

The Tango Catalogue (I've no financial interest) stocks a tape of Tete with
Sylvia.  It was made about three years after he and Maria broke up.  I
haven't seen it in years, and can't review it again until we get home.  But
I recall that the beginning of this tape is of just Tete alone, dancing by
himself, leading an "invisible follower."

Watching this part of the tape would at least provide an interesting
exercise for viewers, allowing them to imagine how they might respond as a
follower to such an incredibly musical lead.

All the best,
Brian Dunn
Dance of the Heart
Boulder, Colorado  USA
www.danceoftheheart.com