[TANGO-L] deepening tango

[H Dickinson <hyladlmp @YAHOO.COM>]

Ohhh, I am liking this latest series of posts!  They are
bringing me into some interesting ideas and feelings.  They have
started several lines of related thoughts; I'm going to post
some separate responses to them.

Rose, the only way I have found to respond to an egotistical
dancer, (one who is not dancing with or for me, but only for
himself) is to be as fully myself as possible, and to make sure
that he knows that I am there.  I bring my interpretation of the
music into as much of the dance as I can, changing the dynamics
of each step, perhaps lingering a little or bringing a feeling
of suspension and pause, before moving to land exactly on the
beat.  Or a little tap or brush with my free foot on his, or on
the floor, to say "I know where you are, and I am here" while
still being able to be ready for the next step.  Brian, in
response to your regret that there are fewer opportunities for
women to improvise in the closest embraces--I have found that
this type of play occurs just as easily in a very restrictive
close embrace as in a more open one.  In fact, it can be easier,
because you have the chance to really know where you are in
relation to one another.  The trick is to entice him into
wanting to listen to you, entice him into wanting to give you
the time and or space to play or pause.

Notice that I am NOT saying that I just do what I want, or I
ignore his lead, or backlead, or overpower him.  No, no--these
are subtle little things and when done right, are at most hints
or suggestions.  Sometimes it is just as little as giving a
touch of resistance so that you both feel as if you are moving
through honey, which can, if the lead is listening to you,
really deepen the connection.  Play with the density of your
connection, how light or heavy you are, whether you are being
staccato or legato, whether your line is long and flowing or
curlique and baroque, or sharp, rectilinear.  Pick up his strong
points and enhance them, or play against them.  It all has to be
within the bounds of your own limitations as a follower, and the
physical limits of the embrace, so you don't upset your balance
or his, you keep track of which foot you are supposed to have
you weight on, you respond to his lead, etc.   And you have to
listen back, so that you can tell if he is not picking this up,
or doesn't choose to respond to it at this time.

This leads to one of two things:  1) The guy is really
interested, sometimes entranced "Wow! That opened up whole new
realms of understanding about the music!"  If he's listening,
maybe you'll give him some ideas to use later, or he might
decide he likes your idea so much that he sets it up again, or
makes a riff on it, picking it up and using it some other way.
And he starts to wonder what he can do to foster that, and
starts to look for other such follows, etc. (one such man tells
me I have a "strong flavor").  2) The guy just can't hear you at
all--he is so caught up in his own thing that any change that
you make to expected timing, or any indication that both your
feet are not exactly where he expects them to be at all times,
either does not register with him, or causes him to think that
you are "messing up", so that he gets frustrated because he is
always assuming that you are "wrong".  He can't accept that you
can end up where he wants you, while varying the route to get
there.

I prefer not to dance with the #2 guys.  What they are looking
for is a very predictable dancer who is there to execute the
"other half" of their artistic vision.  The perfect follow has
perfect balance and is otherwise very predictable and malleable,
existing for his art, sort of like the canvas or paint or clay
to be molded by him.  There is a challenge and pride for the
woman in trying to reach that pinnacle, there is something to be
said for being an "inspiration" by virtue of one's ablity to
execute to perfection every nuance of the guy's vision.  But I
mostly find it boring unless the guy is a very good and creative
dancer; even then it requires a certain repression of my
personality, requires me to subordinate my own response to the
music so that his can have full play.  So there  are a certain
number of dancers who just won't ask me to dance very often--I
am not perfect enough to serve as "inspiration", and not
predictable/malleable enough to serve as the mechanichnistic
means of expressing their vision.  This is fine with me, because
I like to dance with guys who are interested in a shared
experience.  And I'm also kind of tickled by the fact that I am
human, and therefore err, so I'm not that attached to working
toward "perfection", which means I can be pretty imperfect (but
interesting!) at times.

Tango is improvisation, and some leads take that to mean that
they get to improvise their own vision exclusively throughout
the dance.  I like to dance with guys who take a stumble, a
navigation hazard, a nuance of music, a follower's input
(whether that be a "mistake", or a subtle suggestion for a
change of timing, direction, embrace, or depth of connection) as
a possiblity or invitation to expand the improv to a level
beyond their own limited imagination.

What I am talking about is not a barrier to melding.  Sometimes
I will be dancing with a guy who listens so much that he
inspires me to listen so much and then we meld and it's no
longer about "I speak, you listen and respond to me, I listen
and respond to you, etc." but instead about that phenomenon
which Jonathon writes of, that of becoming some other entity for
the duration of the dance where it's not "me and you" or even
"us" but just being/dancing/music.

Hyla




		
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